Our suggested Al-Anon and Alateen closing states,”…though you may not like all of us, you will love us in a very special way–the same way we already love you.” When I first came to Al Anon, I found this statement too incredible to believe. If they really knew me, I thought, they wouldn’t say that. How could anyone possibly like or love me? I certainly didn’t. Nevertheless, they kept on saying it at every meeting. As I began to really respect these people, I wondered if they could be so far off in their opinion of me. Maybe there was something lovable about me after all, although I didn’t know. That’s when members of my group encouraged me to know myself better through Al Anon’s Fourth Step. At first all I saw were my defects. My fellow members encouraged me to seek out my assets as well. They even went so far as to suggest that I embrace my defects and my assets and celebrate they as part of who I am. They assured me that with the help of the Steps that follow, I could let my Higher Power decide which ones I needed to keep. I heard many members say their group loved them until they loved themselves. This was my experience as well. The more my group showed love and respect for me, the more I was able to love myself. Then I could begin to help love others into self-love. What a wonderful way of passing it on.
Thought for the Day
It is heartwarming to know I can lean on other members’ self love until I develop a measure of my own.